KALAAKAR 2010

KALAAKAR 2010

KALAAKAR 2010

Connection to divinity

CONNECTION TO DIVINITY.

WHEN YOU MOVE WITH A CONNECTION TO THE DIVINITY, THERE IS NOTHING THAT IS RICHER THAN THIS. THE RICH FEELING COMES INSIDE YOU WHEN YOU FEEL CONNECTED TO THE DIVINITY, CONNECTED TO THE INFINITE. WHEN THE WAVE REMEMBERS THAT IT'S CONNECTED TO THE OCEAN, THAT IT'S A PART OF THE OCEAN THAT STRENGTH IS ENORMOUS.

Rites Of Happiness

Rites of Happiness

Tips to happier kids

A healthy sense of self-worth, belief and confidence are some of the ingredients for leading a successful and happy life – firstly as an individual and then, in your role as a parent. Facing the trials of being a parent, of being responsible for another person’s life, affects one’s goals, ambitions, attitudes and decisions. It helps to keep a positive outlook on life, as your emotional and mental well-being influences those around you – from your child to your friends, family and colleagues. The way you feel about yourself becomes central to the happiness quotient of your child. So, respond positively to your little one, spend quality time with him and indulge in these interactive exercises.

Positive Sessions

· Tell your child to make a picture of himself or to present him impressions of the family.

· Hang the drawings in a special place as a reminder of your happy time with him.

· Cook your child’s favourite meal and get him to participate in the preparations, to make it more enjoyable for both of you.

· Take a nap with your young one, go on walks, meet his friends, and give him a bubble bath – all positive actions to encourage young minds and bodies.

· Encourage his curiosity; don’t just explain things but participate in the process of discovery with him.

· Show him how something works and if needed, take the help of friends and teachers or of anyone else who might be able to help you.

· Notice and appreciate how your child feels happy and good about himself when he discovers new things.

Parents, at times, have to be as responsible, efficient, resourceful and diligent as managers of a business corporation. They try to not only manage themselves but their children, their jobs and the household. Although, the burden of all these responsibilities might seem too much at times, nevertheless, each one of us do possess a reservoir of immense talent, energy, thoughts and abilities. The trick is to make these positive attributes your strengths and to eliminate the negative thoughts hampering your life. Feel good about yourself by highlighting your and your young one’s resources and talents.

Spreading happiness

· Be on the look out for any special talent that your child exhibits.

· Encourage his abilities and interests – whether in sports or music and participate along with him as far as possible.

· Instead of a story telling session, one night, host a family talent show where each member of the family should participate for maximum fun and bonding.

· Such an activity would satisfy your child’s desire for the unusual in his life, break the monotony of routine happenings, loosen his inhibitions and release any pent-up energy.

· It would provide your family with an opportunity to spend quality time with him.

· Make sure that he is getting enough positive encouragement in his school also.

· Write a poem or a simple, loving note to your child and leave it on his pillow or in his lunch box.

· Make him feel special, loved and happy in the way you know best.

Professional, parental and familial obligations expose one to newer experiences, situations and people. Your may find that, at times, getting along with others poses a challenge. It is always a good idea to treat others the way you would like to be treated. Learning the lessons of life and overcoming the obstacles in the way, provides for the most meaningful experiences. Try to keep your emotional balance and equilibrium. Look at the brighter side of life, banish the negative influences and you will find that your sunny disposition will win you more friends than enemies! How well you get along with those who matter to you has a relation in maintaining a harmonious and stable atmosphere at home and also in imparting positive and happy vibes to your child.

· Provide your child with the right ethical values.

· Always tell him the truth.

· List a few do’s and don’ts for your child – to instill discipline.

· If your child commits a mistake, teach him to take the responsibility for it.

· Encourage your child to think positive.

· If your make a promise to your child, always try to keep it.

· Help him to realize his dreams and ideals.

Triggers for happiness

Triggers for Happiness

Raising emotionally healthy children

Most parents I know want their kids to be happy, besides being healthy of course. But what makes kids happy? Toys and treats? Yes, for a while but, no that’s not what we are dealing with here, but a deeper, more fulfilling route to happiness, raising our children to be emotionally healthy.

Growing up is hard work, not just for kids but for parents as well. Our work goes beyond the basics and doesn’t necessarily include spending a fortune on this hot new toy that he has to have. Although, this will surely be greeted by squeals of joy, and occasionally it does not harm, but that does not mean you have to supply this regularly. That way your kids might just end up over-indulged, spoilt – hardly happy. What we are talking about is long term happiness. What is happiness? Is it being rich, ambitious, achieving and seemingly successful? Or is it having the ability to deal with success as well as failure; of understanding the larger picture wherein joy and pain can coexist.

Simply put, happy children are those who grow up to be happy adults – aware, `whole’ and emotionally healthy people who are secure, who have the capacity to feel not just happiness, but sadness, anger, frustration and empathy, and who are able to take both the ups and downs of life, with an inner sense of calm.

Kids need limits

If parents are nurturing, yet firm, if they set clear definitions of what is acceptable and what’s not, children develop a sense of purpose and feel secure. But kids, after the age of three, need to understand why. When people understand the justification for a rule, they are more likely to comply with it than if they deem it arbitrary or capricious. So when you first give a limit, explain why your child needs to comply with it. Understanding the reason for rules helps your child develop internal standards of behaviour – an understanding of the mechanics of society, of life as we live it. Rather than giving a long explanation that children will tune out, state the reason briefly, for example, “No biting people. It hurts them”; “When you grab toys away from other kids, they feel sad because they still want to play with them,”

Routines and limits spell security for a child. And if you present a directive well, your child is likely to comply.

Understanding why

You should, of course, offer comfort and consolation when your child is hurt, or just angry when things don’t turn out the way he wants them to, but address only the aspect that connects the hurt to a deeper (and inaccurate) sense of rejection. Use these periods as an opportunity to explain to your child and get your child to understand why things happen the way they do.

If we believe that we should protect our child from pain, if we tell him we can always Xrebuild his broken toy, or if we don’t tell him the truth about his grandfather dying, just because we want him to be happy, we will never help him build the skills and strengths he needs to manage his life.

Be consistent

Studies show that the happiest and most secure children are those who know where the limits are. In other words, these children’s parents are consistent in enforcing limits. Almost all children will test the limits to find out where they are. If the rules are not consistently enforced, he will continue to test them. If a child throws a tantrum and gets his way, you can bet you will see more tantrums because the child has learned that whining longer works. By consistently leading your child toward good behaviour and self-discipline, you are giving your child a golden gift of a lifetime. If you want your child to learn certain behaviour, you have to be prepared to be predictable and consistent.

Let them be

Parents, however, need to balance between too much control and being too controlling. Children are happier just to be left alone to do nothing sometimes. Kids, like adults, need unstructured time. Spare time, when your children are doing what we call nothing, not only provides a respite from structured activities but also gives them a chance to learn how to entertain themselves. It lets their imagination grow, which, in turn, nurtures their creativity. Anyone who has ever seen children at play, solving a problem or even trying to spell and unfamiliar word knows that imagination and creativity are things found in every child. Let them play – using their own imagination rather than specific or structured (by adults) activities. It is really up to the parent to give children an atmosphere that makes them feel confident enough to explore, to try new things – and to fail.

Just hanging out with friends is important and contributes to a child’s happiness, creativity and his mental and physical development.

Another thing that is essential is not to be too restrictive about their activities. Don’t be always worried that he will fall if he jumps too high. Rather than always saying, “be careful,” why not let him test new skills. Respect his wants and wishes, sometimes, even when they clash with your own.

Participating in your life

As parents, it’s up to us teach life skills to our kids, so they grow up to become independent, competent, reliable, self-confident, resourceful and responsible adults. Teaching while being a parent is not about taking time out of every day to impart some great wisdom.

BE WHAT YOU WANT TO BE

WHATEVER YOU DO, SOMEONE WILL CRITICIZE YOU. YOU WILL BE BLAMED IF YOU ACT AND EVEN IF YOU DON'T ACT. IF YOU SPEAK DON'T SPEAK YOU CAN'T KEEP PLEASING EVERYONE IF YOUR FOCUS IS ON FINDING SHORT COMINGS EITHER OF IN YOUR SELF OR OTHERS, YOU CANNOT RISE HIGHER. RECOGNIZE THAT IF SOMEONE GIVE A COMMENT, REFLECT ON IT. IF THERE IS SOME TRUTH, ACCEPT IT. IF NOT, THEN THANK THEM AND MOVE ON.

To Lend an Ear

To Lend an Ear!

Listening to your child will set the pattern for his communication skills

There may be many ways to establish a bond with your child and one of them could be to listen to him. At this age, when your child’s vocabulary and language skills are expanding, talking and communicating with you can make him feel secure and cared about.

It is important

Listening to your child will increase your understanding of his thoughts and feelings, his concerns and his `little world’. Often, with the pressure of everyday life, we may fail to take notice of what the child is seeking our attention for. Your four-year-old runs up to you, asking you to hear what his friend had told him in the play school. You are in the middle of your preparations for dinner and you listen to him with half-an-ear. The child, even at this age, may realise that he doesn’t have your full attention. When children feel they have something to say or to show and are repeatedly ignored by a `too busy’ adult, they may give up and quit trying. The result is that the child then does not communicate well and it may even stifle the growth of the child’s mind, ability and self-confidence. Or your child, trying to get the attention due to him may start to misbehave or through tantrums, which is bound to affect you, your child and the family atmosphere adversely.

Effective Listening

To foster better communication, listen and communicate as clearly as possible exactly what you mean. By listening to what your child may be trying to communicate, you can be an active and responsive parent. This means listening to both the verbal and non-verbal messages. Spoken words are only part of the message. Be aware of cues like lack of eye contact, clenched fists or a hunched posture. A child at this age may stumble while trying to verbalize his thoughts so, by giving him time to express himself you can be of help to him. When relating and communicating with a young child, it may be best to not respond with commands, solutions or lectures. Instead, if you are trying to tell something to your child, keep your language simple and don’t pass on too many messages at once. It may even be best to use just one-word messages. It may also help to repeat back what your child says to you and to check out whether you understand his thoughts. Reflecting back on meanings can then, help you to understand your child’s message. Silent acknowledgement along with a nod of the head, or even eye contact is also useful. Even if the child is angry, disrespectful or loud, take a moment to consider the message the child may be trying to convey.

Value his thoughts

Everyone’s feelings have worth and it would help to show your pre-schooler that you acknowledge and respect his feelings, too. Look for ways to spend special time with your child. make the effort and the time to be with your child as an involved, interested and non-judgmental parent. At the same time, it is important to listen with respect. Similarly, listen to your own words and think how your child will interpret them. Try to ask him the kind of questions that would encourage him to give you specific information about his feelings. Don’t wait for an opportunity to stage a conversation, instead talk to him for instance, about his day at school. A child’s concerns may be different than yours but the feelings, the emotions are the same. The child, therefore, should be confident of the responses he’ll receive to his conversations.

There is a need to foster in him the freedom to express his feelings and views without fear of ridicule or judgement. Somebody had said that listening is love in action. When you listen, you teach the child that he is important. The child then learns to trust his perceptions and rely on a relationship based on open communication. Sometimes children have hidden fears that they may be unable to talk about. By listening and encouraging your child to communicate with you, you can cue in to your child’s world.

Fun at Home

Fun at HOME

Games for your child which involve zero expense and

can be played in the comfort of your home

There is a little explorer in every child, waiting to emerge at the slightest encouragement. Your child does not need much to spark her imagination. Hand her some items from your kitchen for instance, and see what she makes out of them. A rolling pin can become a car, a container her drum.

Your child’s games are a great way for her to have fun, aiding in her growth and there is also a lesson in them for you – that, there is no reason why you should depend on expensive and complicated toys to spark your child’s creativity and love of fun and games. What’s more with school holidays round the corner and winter having set in most parts of the country, you can keep your young one entertained and occupied with these simple and innovative games.

Here are a few games, which promise endless rewards – in terms of the time you get to spend with your child – and the minimum expense involved.

Miniature bowling alley!

What you’ll need: 10 cans, coloured paper, glue, a medium-size ball.

Arrange the cans in a triangular shape on the floor. The back row should have four cans and the front row, one. Paste the cans with colourful paper and make your child stand at a distance of about six feet from the cans. Give her the ball and explain that you want her to knock down as many cans as she can by rolling the ball down the floor. With time and encouragement, she will soon learn to play this game on her own or with her friend and may even set up the cans herself. There can be a variation to this game after she has mastered the art of bowling. Line up two or three cans, side by side with some distance between each can. Have her try to roll the ball between the cans without knocking them down. The game can then help in your child’s hand-eye co-ordination.

Making Noises

What you’ll need: Objects that create a variety of sounds – like a bell, a whistle, a toy horn, two pencils to tap, two plastic bottles – one filled with small beads or coins and the other with cereals.

Demonstrate how each object makes its own sound. After your child is familiar with each object by sight and sound, have her cover her eyes and try to identify each sound-maker as you recreate the noise.

Occasionally, you can demonstrate natural sounds as well. Clap your hands, click your fingers, stomp your feet, cough, sneeze, laugh, whistle – and have a rollicking time when she follows suit. The game can then help to refine auditory perception and the ability to recall sounds.

Tell-tale tastes

What you’ll need: A wide range of food, with different tastes – cookies, bananas, ice cream, and a piece of cloth to blindfold.

Arrange two sample pieces of each food on a tray. Explain to your child that the object of the game is to identify the sample of the food by taste, smell and touch. Have her examine the food and then blindfold her. Give her one sample at a time and see whether she can match the two samples together. After you have gone through all the food samples, remove the blindfold and see how many she has matched correctly. You could as a variation, arrange foods that are vastly different in taste – something sweet and sour and ask her to describe it. The game can help your child to explore her senses and match and identify them with the foods.

The two of you

What you’ll need: Your child and … you!

Have your child stand next to you and explain to her that she has to mimic your actions. Ask her to give a big smile, open and shut the door, put your hands on the top of your head, clasp your hands. As the game progresses, you can make the instructions more and more complicated. This game can actually raise a few chuckles of delight and help you child to follow and understand instructions. The game can also familiarize her with various actions.

Turning `green’

What you’ll need: potatoes, other vegetables, glass jars, cloth, toothpicks and tin pans.

This activity helps your child to set up plants and watch their progress. To make a potato plant, stick toothpicks around the middle of a potato. The toothpicks will hold the potato upright when you place it in a jar of water. Make sure that the bottom end is submerged in the water and the toothpicks are resting steadily on the rim of the jar. Check the plants daily, add water when necessary and see how the roots gradually grow and expand.

You can sprinkle a few pulses in a shallow tin filled with water and explain to your child that in a few days the seeds will germinate. She can in fact check it frequently and can cultivate an interest in gardening. Apart from engaging your child’s interest, this activity can teach her about the environment. Growing a kitchen garden of her own may stimulate in her an interest in food – a fun solution to entice picky eaters.

It’s a number game

What you’ll need: 11 pieces of numbered paper (from0 to 10), 58 paper clips.

Once your child can identify the numbers, then you can show her the value of each number by counting out with her a corresponding number of paper clips for each card. Or you can collect 11 envelopes, each of them numbered and show your child how to fill each envelope with the proper number of clips. The game can help your child to practise her motor skills and to identify numbers and associate them with the right quantity.

Total recall

What you’ll need: a box, 10 small objects like a pencil, button, rubber, toy car, ruler et cetera.

Place the objects in the box and have your child study them carefully. She can pick up each object and describe them to you. Then put the objects back in the box and close the lid. See how many items she can recall and describe. Or you can take several pictures from magazines that have a lot of colour. Introduce one picture at a time, discuss the subject matter and specific details. Cover the picture and ask her to tell you what she can remember. Developing language skills and improving visual memory can become the purpose of the game.

Putting it together

What you’ll need: four colourful pictures of familiar figures – for example, Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck et cetera. Cut along the lines and create puzzle pieces.

Put all the four puzzles on a tray. Introduce them one at a time to your child and let her practise putting them together. She will soon learn to put the puzzles together on her own. The game can help her to put things together and recognize shape relations.

Antariksh Kukreja- The First Student of Little Kingdom School( Now,an Industrialst)

IF A RUNNER STARTS LOOKING BEHIND AT WHO'S RUNNING, AND NOT LOOKING AT THE PATH, HE NEEDS TO RUN ON, THEN ULTIMATELY HE WILL LOSE, NO MATTER HOW GOOD THE RUNNER MAY BE. YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW YOUR OWN TRACK, TO COMPLETE THE RUN - WHETHER YOU LOSE OR WIN.

Bridging the Gap

Learning to appreciate and accept differences

Some children live in homes where they are read to every day. Other children are sung to every day. Some children live with their mother and father. Some live with grandparents and a single parent. Some speak Hindi, some Tamil, most speak English, but some do not. Some go to the temple everyday, others go to a gurudwara or a church, one in a while.

When these children enter school, they bring with them a vast range of early childhood experiences, skills and knowledge. How best do we prepare our children to meet the challenges and reap the benefits of the increasingly diverse world they will inherit? By making them aware of differences and accepting them. Positive awareness of differences across race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, economic and peer identity increases positive understanding. Never before was this more apparent than now, with the recent terrorist attacks in the United States, and their aftermath. Dialoguing across differences in the classrooms will create environments where there is no room for misconceptions or myths. We can raise children to value diversity, teach them to respect and value people regardless of their physical abilities, economic background or the language they speak.

Fearing differences

Why do we fear differences? Psychologists say that our comfort zones are threatened when we face differences, because it is easier to discuss our similarities. A lack of understanding and, perhaps, fear of something that is different, perpetuates myths and stereotypes. Schools need to then become an environment where students learn, apart from academics, an appreciable amount of other skills: the ability to reason; to argue without hostility; to tolerate and respect other people’s viewpoints; to be empathetic to others. Teachers and parents then must give out the same message – that everyone has differences, and that it is not a bad thing.

Appreciating individuality

The challenge for the education system is to treat each child as an individual. If one treats everyone the same, you are not using each child’s uniqueness. Psychologists assert that we should seek and recognise differences and help each child feel comfortable with those. Which is why some schools believe in integrating children with disabilities into a regular classroom at the pre-school and primary level. A primary benefit of integrating children with disabilities into early childhood settings is that all children learn to accept differences in other children. Integration also provides children with disabilities with more normalized experiences and chances to socialize.

According to experts, all children have behaviour that can be annoying. If a child with a disability doesn’t understand what bothers other children, such as putting their arms around another child and getting into their space, then the disability rather than the behaviour, can be seen as the problem. It is the role of the teacher to help the children to relate successfully. So that what was difficult to understand for the children who do not have disabilities then becomes only something different, and they learn to appreciate the diversity.

Learning to value differences

According to the Montessori system, though we are all the same inside, we are very different from one another in the ways we live our lives and perceive the world. We must learn to see people as they really are, and not be afraid of that which is strange and vastly different from our own ways. With older children, this readily extends to the study of political and moral differences among societies.

Of course, expert’s caution that it does not mean to suggest that we ought to teach children that everything people do is equally good. As mankind matures, we have begun to develop global standards by which we judge certain actions and political systems to be destructive of the human spirit.

Psychologists say that children begin to form ideas about themselves and other people long before they start proper school, so it is important to begin teaching antibias lessons early. And if schools reinforce these lessons, children will learn to appreciate, rather than fear differences and to recognise bias and stereotype when they see them. After all, is not the goal of education to prepare children to grapple with the real issues of their times.

When does it start?

An important task for parents is to help children learn about acceptable behaviour and caring attitudes towards others from the beginning. The foundation of self-awareness is laid when children are still babies and toddlers. At this stage the child is only learning what is `me’ and what is not `me’.

By age two children begin to realise and explore physical differences. Natural curiosity will lead to questions about differences. At this age experts say, children are better at noticing differences among people. However, their thinking is still limited, and it is easy for them to believe stereotypes and form pre-prejudices. Research shows that children are aware of gender differences and stereotypes at around the age of two to three years. And by age four or five, children want to show mastery of their gender roles, which are more rigid and stereotyped than they will be later.

By age five or six, children can make distinctions between members of the same cultural or racial group. They are developing social skills and enjoy exploring the culture of their friends. They continue to ask questions about physical differences, and now, say experts, they understand the explanation for these.

During the early primary years (ages six and seven) children can consider multiple attributes at one time. They understand how one person can be member of several different groups – for instance one person can be a part of a family, a classroom, a culture, a religion. Children at this age are also aware of feelings of pride and shame. They may also be aware of racism against their own group and religion.

The goal of parents and teachers is to help all children develop a positive self-concept and feel proud of who they are, although, we don’t want them to feel superior to other groups. If this positive sense of self and others is allowed to flourish, children will become adults who accept and affirm differences, identify unfair situations, and strive to eliminate prejudice of any sort.